Defense of being a Catholic

We all wear a string of definitions, whether we like them or not. We slowly, from the time we are young, add one on top of the other. Occasionally, they are contradictions of each other, but more often all are based on a moral principle that we could state if we were asked. Often, we don't even know that we had or have a position on something until a situation arises. Someone says something and inside a voice suddenly whispers or screams, “NO”. And if we look further, we can find the reason for the no, but often we just accept that this is how we feel.

My definitions are (in no particular order) Catholic, Wife, Mother, Daughter, Friend Granddaughter, Sister, Anti-Abortion, etc. etc. etc. You can guess some of the etc.... Like that I am against the use of Capital Punishments, but probably not all of them, like I think that some sort of same sex union should be available.

I treasure my values. It is exciting to teach my morals to my children and see when they really, really understand them. I cherish my relationship with God. While I am Catholic, I have no issue with anyone of other religions. I will listen to the guy who knocks on my door, concerned about my relationship with Christ. I will tolerate being called a Fornicator by the guy on the soapbox in front of the Student Union. I have no problem with Kosher food, and my OB is Muslim, a talented physician.

But, I am Catholic. It means so much to me. Confession, Communion, all that standing and kneeling and sitting, that is me. I have more children than you probably do. I don't use birth control, and I won't. My other OB, the one I had to see in case mine isn't available for the birth is as far as I can tell a wonderful physician, but he doesn't seem to respect my Catholicism. He has asked me three times if I wanted my tubes tied during the birth of my next child. (No, No, and No). I explained that I was Catholic, but he suggested that rules were made to be broken. I explained that I was a devout Catholic, but he suggested that I had fulfilled my obligation with the two that I have plus the one that I'm baking now. Then, I just settled on a firm “No”. I am astounded that I had to go this far with him. That I had to go this far actually makes me a tiny bit nervous about the C-Section. I'm having my Muslim doctor watch out for my fertility.

I've seen more and more of this from more and more fronts. Since the humiliating facts surrounding both the behavior of a small number of priests who victimized young boys, and the cover up which it seems was known by a large portion of the hierarchy of my Church, it seems that it is OK with the community to do a bit of Catholic bashing without concern that someone might be offended. Or, perhaps they don't care.

Here is my defense. There is a large part of the population of the Catholic community in the US that has decided to be selectively Catholic. Church when they feel like it, abortion if it is 'necessary', divorce if explainable, living together if they are in love, and birth control. To my own shame, I have turned my back against some of the teachings of the Church, but I repented. I regret the mistakes I've made. I don't walk around thinking that I am better than anyone who has chosen to ignore a teaching that is inconvenient. but please, lets not assume that because one person has, that all Catholics are comfortable with it.

All of the teachings are rather sound in principle. I didn't always feel that way, and it took a book about Jewish people to convince me of it. The book was discussing the practice of separate Kitchens for dairy and meat in Jewish households, also the practice of keeping Kosher when eating meat. Most of the practices of keeping Kosher are designed (according to this Rabbi) to make the eating of meat a bit sacred. The fact that an animal has to be killed (and all killing has an impact slightly violent on the person who does it), and these practices are designed to keep the killing evident (much like tuna in a can keeps the death of an animal so distant). Before I read this, I was stumped by the labor intesive practices of keeping Kosher. It helped me to understand more of the practices of the Catholic Church. I may not currently understand the teaching, but if I ask (usually my Dad) I can find out (or he can for me).

For an example, lets get back to birth control. The act of SEX in all its sweaty fun, is an act of love designed to create life. To put artifical birth control in the picture takes this reality away, makes sex something that is potientially praticed between strangers, something that needs accessories, something to be watched... certainly nothing sacred. To take away the sacredness of sex, is to cheapen the potiential of what it can be, especially between married persons. I don't judge, I understand that another baby can wreck all the plans of the family. We are rarely in the position that one more child won't put everything back into the air, even for those of means.

Natural Family Planning is a way around that. And, for the most part, it works. Keeping you child free when you desire so, and child filled when you desire that. But, it takes the ultimate decisions out of your hands. You can find yourself pregnant when you didn't intend. You can find your life turned upside down in the best possible way when you didn't expect it. And you can trust that God won't let you down.

Copyright (c) June 22, 2005 by Janet Johnson. http://liam-and-janet.blogspot.com